Ah Bugger

The vapid utterings of a neurotic mind.

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Location: DC, United States

I ain't too proud to bug.

Friday, August 18, 2006

Happy Birthday Marci!!!

In honor of the Super* Baby's birthday, here is some banana fun for you.

Fun online games to play with bananas are tic tac banana; rock, scissors, banana; banana checkers; and who wants to be a banillionaire.

A slightly disturbing game to play with a banana goes as follows. "Ask for four volunteers and sit two of them on chairs. Put a banana between the legs of the girls sitting on the chairs and tell the other two they have to open and eat the banana without using their hands (handcuffs normally sort that out).The first girl to finish wins." From the nice people at EventWise.com.

Grand Junction, Colorado has a fun park called, yeah, you guessed it! Banana Fun Park!!! It's fun for all ages.

I wanted to talk about "banana" movies, but they all seem to be of the dirrty variety and I'm not comfortable with that. You, however, can have a look should you desire to by going here.

I can tell you about the B. Banana's favorite tv show. It's called Bananas in Pyjamas. They have a great theme song. Let's sing it together.

"Banana's in Pyjamas are coming down the stairs.
Banana's in Pyjamas are coming down in pairs.
Banana's in Pyjamas are chasing teddy bears.
'cos on Tuesdays they all try to catch them unawares!"
There is so much to discuss in those four short lines. What are teddy bears doing so that they are unaware on Tuesdays when apparently, they are so alert the other six days of the week. What's up with those crazy bananas? What were they doing upstairs prior to coming after the teddy bears? And why couldn't they be bothered to get dressed?
Some gift ideas for those of you who just can't quite come up with the perfect gift:

  • Show her you really care about her. Get her a beautiful 14-Karat Gold 3-D Authentic Looking Banana Charm. Save money, too! Originally this priceless gem went for $214.99. Now, you lucky dog, you can get it for the low-low price of $112.99!!!!! Hop to it!
  • While the date is a bit off, I'll bet this t-shirt would bring a smile to the BB's face.
  • A girl as pretty as Marci needs a cute little bag for her banana flavoured lipglosses. Please consider this as a gift option.
  • Yes there is a plastic container in which you may stuff your banana in order to keep it from getting smashed in your lunch bag, but Marci is much classier than plastic. Give her something porcelain, something Russian, to put her bananas in.
  • And finally, this would give her a place to rest post her weekly 2089 mile runs.
  • Do not give her real bananas. Thank you. You may buy ME a banana split if you so desire.

Should you need more gift ideas. Lemme know. I know just what she wants.

* Pheh, She is a super BABY. I dunno about the SUPER baby. I AM THE BABY, not Marci. Longstanding adopted sibling rivalry here. Love you M! (To the moon.)


Breakfast heartache

I was busily foraging through my Kellogg's Special K Red Berries yesterday afternoon, harvesting all the delightful tasty freeze-dried strawberries that create a flavor sensation in my mouth. (Yes, I still eat Kellogg's, even after finding out about old Dr. Kellogg and his crazy crazy ways.)
This morning, I poured my bowl of cereal and it was all flakes. It turns out that I don't really like Special K sans Red Berries. Sigh.

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Wake up.

Shut up.

The following usually occurs when I am quietly reading a document or something online that is not requiring me to move anything but my eyes and whatever autonomous muscle function that goes on.

I frickin' hate people who walk by my desk and say "Wake up". HAHAhahahaHAhah. Omigod, that's the most clever thing I have heard all day. You are so original.

Repeat several times through day.

Guilty or not?

What a scary police state we live in sometimes. I was watching "The Inside Man" the other day, and the police questioned everyone involved. Let's change that to manhandled everyone. A Sikh gets his turban removed and not returned (a highly offensive maneuver); everyone is treated as a suspect. I understand that they did not know who was a bad guy and who wasn't, but haven't the people who just were held hostage in a bank robbery been through enough? Geez, and then to be accused and beaten about by the police after. No wonder so many people have trust issues with law enforcement.

So they found JonBenet Ramsey's killer, at least the man who after being arrested, claimed to have killed her and that it was "an accident". They traced him to Thailand after the emails he'd been exchanging with some JonBenet documentarist for the past two years turned ugly. Didn't anyone question why this random guy was emailing her? And to get off topic for a moment, is it possible that this guy is so delusional that he thinks he did it? He is a pedophile and a child porn afficiando. He may have known or been aware of the Ramsey's from their time in Atlanta, where he lived as well. Maybe the murder caught his attention because he knew (of) them and after a while, he got so delusional that he believed he did it. I don't know. I just think it is bizarre how long this has taken and how he just openly admitted that he killed her after all this time. Smells to me of those people who confess to crimes just for the attention. But maybe he did it. If they still have the DNA from the crime scene, they can compare it and know for sure.

My point with the JonBenet case is that they blatantly attacked the parents for it. Her mother died just a few months ago with the accusation that she murdered her child over her like a black cloud. Isn't it awful enough to lose your child, especially in such a horrific manner, but then to have to suffer through the notion that you were the one to do it? I understand that many of the children murdered in their homes are killed by someone in the family circle, but there has to be a better way of managing these types of cases. It all leads back to the question of is it better to execute an innocent man, or let a guilty man go.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Off the top of my head

I have talked about him before, and here I am again. The morning radio show I listen to is Elliot in the Morning on DC101. This morning he had some unfortunate girl who avidly discussed her sex life which involved some things she will hopefully eventually come to regret. But that’s my opinion and not necessarily that of anyone else. But I guess the conversation got rather graphic as callers phoned in and Elliot was suddenly gone in favor of some rock music as DC101 is the only station that really ROCKS! I think that every time they bump Elliot for being too graphic, they should play “I Fought the Law and the Law Won!”

I woke up this morning and took out the recycling that comes on Wednesday. I was counting the days until payday and happy that the week was already flying by. Sat down at my desk and looked at the lunch calendar, moved it to the Wednesday page and thought, wait. It’s not Wednesday. It is Tuesday. What a honking pile of doody.

I have the craziest fan base! My ex and his girlfriend are back to reading my blog. We broke up almost a year and a half ago. Well, me and the guy. I have never met the girl. I should say hi! How is it going? How are you two kids doing? Say hi to Jessica and Brian for me. If you read my blog, you should leave comments every now and then.

I did not enjoy a creamsicle yesterday on National Creamsicle day, but I did take my left handed mother out for breakfast on National Left handed people day on Sunday. (Uh, she took me out. But I cheersed her left handed!)

Would I still be cool if I brought “Near Beer” to the next baseball game? Because DC Sports Chick, you are killing me! You would have thought all that beer would have made me think that the ugly baby was not so ugly… But alas.

Finally, I have a question. If you weren’t going to use your car for a year would you store it or sell it?

Monday, August 14, 2006

Celebrating August 14

Ouyay aymay ebay onderingway ywhay isthay isway igpay atinlay. Ellway, etlay emay elltay ouyay! Itway isway Ationalnay Odecay Alker'stay Ayday!