Ah Bugger

The vapid utterings of a neurotic mind.

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Location: DC, United States

I ain't too proud to bug.

Friday, September 08, 2006

MAKE IT STOP


Oh good and dear Lord, make Jamie Foxx stop singing. He is using his voice to bludgeon me and each fluctuation is like a stab to my soul. And the song? What was that? Musical porn?

"Can I take you home, girl? Getcha all alone, baby and do you like I want to and kiss you like I want to."

Awkward moaning and off pitch wailing with the occassional air sucking in so as to maybe demonstrate desire? Then, the ubiquitous oh oh oh oh. OH OH OH OH. ohhhh ohhhh ohhh ohhh ohhhhh.

Why are celebrities trying to make me go deaf? And why am I a captive audience?

On a related note: I have not yet watched the second episode of Celebrity Duets, but I will because I have no regard for my own well being. I do it all for you.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

I have been a resident of this area most of my life.

There is a part of me that really is not fond of the personality type that seems to exist and thrive in Washington DC. I dislike how people don't seem to look out for each other. Everyone is only interested in how they can get ahead, and if you get in the way, well, there is a great possibility that you will be steamrolled. (And I don't mean in a super cool, Strange Brew kind of way.) The worst part of that is that the steamroller8/204/200/Image(08).jpg" border="0" alt="" />



Zouk and Phuture last night. It was a crazy ordeal. No camera = no pics. =) Too bad. Next time.



I love my boyfriend!gger.com/blogger/1808/204/200/Image%2809%29.jpg" border="0" alt="" />



Zouk and Phuture last night. It was a crazy ordeal. No camera = no pics. =) Too bad. Next time.



I love my boyfriend!

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Smeh

Is it just me, or is the whole Suri "Tomkitten" Holmes-Cruise thing kind of a let down? I saw the pictures this morning and there they are. It's a kid. Wooo.
I liked her better when she was a pillow stuffed under Katie's shirt, or an alien with tentacles. The alien story could have some shelf life in it yet as we can say that they had to wait for four months to get the human suit to fit properly. She does had the downward slope of Katie's eyes, so I may buy that Katie Holmes did indeed, bring a baby into the world. I am holding my judgment on paternity until the kid's teeth come in, so as to see whether they are jacked up like Tom's. You remember how his teeth were all pushed to the side so in effect he had one front tooth? Look here. Ha! No, I'm kidding. That photo just made me laugh. Look here. There you can see his front tooth. I am standing by my assertion that this slimy fella is the father and that they are expecting Suri Cruise to grow up to be the Scientologist Messiah. I bet she grows up to be Courtney Love. Just a thought. Are the Scientologists going to come after me? I'm fairly unpure. The process for converting me would be way too involved.
Gotta go.

Monday, September 04, 2006

Crikey means gee whiz, wow!

Steve Irwin was killed this morning while filming an undersea documentary, by a stingray. The stingray's barb hit the Crocodile Hunter right in the heart. The venom went straight into his system causing cardiac arrest. Death from stingray attacks is very rare. It is a weird way for a man who dealt with some of the most dangerous creatures on the planet to die. I really used to love watching his crazy antics.
R.I.P
Steve Irwin
1962-2006


I have no fear of losing my life - if I have to save a koala or a crocodile or a kangaroo or a snake, mate, I will save it. Steve Irwin

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Recap of a show you probably didn't watch, but I did and will again.

Dear friends,
As my predilection for bad reality television keeps me monitoring the channels for new shows to tape, I found and watched Celebrity Duets tonight. As such, should you desire to speak with me, you must do so via written word as my ears have turned black and fallen off from the musical stylings of the wondrous pipes of those such as Leah Thompson and Carly Patterson (the gymnast who apparently plans to make a career out of singing. Singing. With her voice.)



Some notes from my experience:

My relationship with (wrestler) Chris Jericho is over. You heard it here first! The singing and stage presence was so unfortunate. Well, maybe I wouldn't kick him out of bed, unless he tried singing to me. (He is just a little too cute. And the acid wash, tightly fitted gray jeans were making me go blind in my left eye. I had already begun to lose my hearing at this point, losing an eye was simply too much to bear.) I did not want to see the softer side of Chris Jericho. I liked the Best Week Ever Chris.

I think that the crush that was reserved for Chris has been transferred to Lucy Lawless (though I would kick her out for singing, too). Has she always been that pretty?

Hal Sparks is kind of dweeby, but he could be my boyfriend if he'd just call me back.

Please send Carly Patterson home. She makes my ears fold up and insert themselves into my eustachian tubes in an attempt to protect me from the horror.

Fricken' hell! Gladys Knight is adorable. The little Randy Jackson inside my head is all "She Blows, Dog!" Which I find viciously insulting of such an icon, so I had the little Simon Cowell in my head knock him down.

Um... Little Richard talked at length about Cheech Marin's bone.... um.... That gives me scabies. Gross.

I kind of dig Michelle Williams voice. (Destiny's Child #3). I wonder how many packs of cigarettes I would have to smoke in order to sound like her.

Send Carly Patterson home. (I totally give her props for being so brave, but honey, think of the children.)

Does Little Richard do his own bedazzling or does he send it out? Why is he little Richard? Who was big Richard? Is something little on him? Scratch that! Don't wanna know.

I had to fast forward through the recap to see them send Carly Patterson home, right? It's between her and my ex. Keep Chris. At least he is hot, even if he is wearing those jeans.

They kept Carly and sent Chris Jericho packing. (Ha, packing.) Damn. At least he won't sink further. Go do something fierce, Chris! Maybe my crush on you will resurface... when you are not singing.