Ah Bugger

The vapid utterings of a neurotic mind.

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Location: DC, United States

I ain't too proud to bug.

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Oh, what a feeling! Is it me you're looking for? 'Cause I'm dancing on the ceiling...

I went to the Leukemia Ball with my friend M in early March. Lionel Ritchie was performing and M and I broke away from our pack to get ourselves to a good vantage point on a very overcrowded with black-tied DC uppercrusticals. (How did we get here?) Ah, being in a crowd of Washingtonians is always a delight. The women in their 50's who dress like they are 20. The women in their 20's who dress like they are 50. A confused bunch to be sure.

We broke to the front of the stage, much to the chagrin of the nasties behind us and much to the delight of one Mr. Ritchie, who brought his surprisingly sweaty self over to hand molest M for a solid minute, again to the chagrin of the nasties behind us. Seriously, at first it was all like "Go M! He loves ya, babe!" and then as it progressed, it got more and more uncomfortable and I started going "Stop it! Lionel Ritchie! Stop hand raping my friend."

After the show, we broke into the photo line and this exchange occurred:
M: You were my first..!
Lionel: (looking aghast) !
M: (finishes thought) concert.
Lionel: (looks relieved)

So there was some more chatter, then the photographer got antsy, hollered at us and this is what resulted.

I look horrendous, Lionel looks crazy and M is so pretty. Like how she matched her shoulder thingie with the colors of the banner?

That dress I am wearing is soo pretty, but 2 sizes too big and therefore would fall off if I bent over in any manner. Dangerous!

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Some notes

Ok, first off I want to thank you people for coming and looking at my incoherent ramblings over 10,000 times! Yay. I feel popular. I wanted to throw a party for the 10,000th person, but oops. You can all come and hang out with me. I will be at Tallulah's later tonight.

Note to young guy who walked in front of me in the parking lot at work today. Why did you stuff your left trouser pocket so full that you looked and walked like you had a hugenormous tumor on your leg. If you have a tumor, get well soon! He was leaning and hobbling and whistling. Get a man bag... (Don't really, but at least carry some of that crap elsewhere... ) Get a briefcase? Leave some of it at home? So many options. You went for shoving it all in one pants pocket. Great.

Note to guy behind me when I turned my car around in the middle of the street to park facing opposite of the way I had driven in. Pay attention! Cripes, I was waving you to go around me like a lunatic and you were all, blah blah blah to your passenger and I was left to rapidly and aggressively parallel park (which, luckily, I am good at) and masses of cars were building up behind you and they all looked angrily at me once they finally go to go. You suck.

Note to boss who waiting until 4:58 PM to tell me to finish up something that needed to be done by the guy who does our printing... He'd like to go home, too.

Not to tacos that fall apart as soon as I take a bite. Why do you taunt me so with your yummy taste, only to demonstrate yourself to be impossible to eat? And then leave me to stare longingly at your remains.

Note to Cingular: Thanks for the rebate card. I know just what I am going to do with it! off to meet the girls!