Ah Bugger

The vapid utterings of a neurotic mind.

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Location: DC, United States

I ain't too proud to bug.

Saturday, July 07, 2007

George Washington remains a stranger to me.

Dear Washington Nationals,
My friends and I were super excited to get tickets for the July Fourth game. As it was an early game (12:05pm), we decided that a breakfast tailgate was in order. Delicious treats were prepared and mimosa's were enjoyed while some of us pretended to study for the bar. (Ok, one of us. But we were so excited to get her out that we indulged the occasional comment on an amendment.)
We picked up our tickets at will call after standing in an incredibly long but very fast moving line. (Where was my birthday present, ticket seller Jesse?)
Fired up about our America's Birthday gift from the Nationals, we ran inside only to find that no bobbleheads were being given out. We went and stood in the bobblehead line to be told that without a voucher, we would get nothing. No bobblehead for you! (By the way, what is up with the Teddy Roosevelt bobblehead? That is what nightmares are made of!)
Meanwhile, people are walking by with four or five boxes. No wonder there were none left for us. We also found out that they only had 20,000 of them. Why so few? Is this a Capitals playoff game? Prepare for the crowds, Nationals! Prepare for the crowds. You let me down. I am extremely bitter. I wanted my little founding father to sit on my desk and nod at me when I get frustrated at work and need some encouragement. You prevent this, Nationals. If I have a bad day, I will blame it on you. So easily you could have given me a little shot of enthusiasm. Instead you led me on and let me down.
Disappointed, we went (empty handed) to our seats. Needing to drown our sorrows, we went outside our section where the beer seller was a total tool. So I kicked him. (In my imagination). I think that you fired him, though, because he was no where to be found after our first beer. Good move.
Oh, and where the hell is Ryan Church? Huh? Where?
The team (even though they were missing Ryan Church) sensed our anger and kicked ass on the field. Great game, you guys!

I want my bobblehead.

Evan Almighty (sucky)

I watched Evan Almighty. Wow, what a cinematic gem this was. It was hard to stomach the premise from the start because God made a covenant with Noah after the original floods subsided, saying that he would never flood the Earth again. Hence, the rainbow. ("I establish my covenant with you, that never again shall all flesh be cut off by the waters of a flood, and never again shall there be a flood to destroy the earth." Gen. 9:8)
We do find that God did not truly break his covenant. Instead, a lot of time was wasted, and probably some lives were lost, in order to make a point about corrupt politicians.
Why bring in two of each animal? Is the wildlife population in Northern Virginia more diverse than I had ever realized? Was it necessary to gather them all up in case the minute flood got out of hand? Perhaps the bear and coyote issues that we have been seeing in the news of late came to an end thanks to Evan's ark. OR maybe this was also a commentary on the National Zoo, who was having an exceedingly difficult time keeping animals alive, you know due to putting rat poison out and just having a generally murder-y time. (They seem to be better now...)
Why did he have to look like Noah? Was it to humiliate Evan? I mean, I think I got it. I think the movie was trying to say that politicians are jerks who ruin the environment. (See Evan's Hummer, Home, Etc..)
Watch out, Capitol Hill. Your corruption will be repaid by an alpaca spitting gunk in your face.


Thursday, July 05, 2007

Delicious Chili Cheese corn chips by Frito.

In Colorado, they are on the shelf to buy any time. Here, they are "Limited Anniversary Edition". Hmph. Everything I like goes away.
  • Tootsie Pop Popsicles
  • Snackwell's Cracked Pepper crackers
  • OJ's cereal. (But it was orange Juice, not the wife/ waiter killer)
  • Swanson weenie and beans TV dinner. It was good, with Chocolate pudding AND apple slices.
  • Cap'n Cruch Oops All Berries
  • The little bag that had just the insides of Zots candy. YUM.
I am sure there is a ton of other stuff, but I am still at work and I have a mazillion things to do.
Bring back the stuff I like. I feel like I buy the hell out of it and still you respect me not.