Ah Bugger

The vapid utterings of a neurotic mind.

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Location: DC, United States

I ain't too proud to bug.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Where are my hot motorcycle men to assist me in my driving endeavors?

I hate motorcades. Hate them. Why do you get to stop traffic for miles around with your hot little motorcycle cops that won’t even ride shirtless for the delight of the female traffic prisoners? Why do I have to stop for a damn motorcade every time I drive into the city? Does the President see me coming and freak out, forcing the world to come to a complete stop? Would anyone really care if he was in the passenger seat of his pal’s Ford Super Duty 250 Lariat pickem up truck? I think we would react as we Washingtonians do to most celebrities. “Oh look, it is the President. GO! The light is green!” Then cut him off while flipping the bird.
When I was a kid, we went on a field trip to the Smithsonian. We were all packed into the yellow bus (a long, one, thank you) and were on our way to stand in line for four hours to see the Hope Diamond, which by the way, wow*. We had to pull the bus over for the Presidential motorcade. But Reagan at least rolled his window down and waved to us kiddies.

On a different note, but still about traffic, I drove to DC last night and found myself, along with half the driving population in the “Bus Only” lane. There were busses trying to get through. No wonder our bus system is so sucky. Someone should have given every one of a ticket for being in that lane. The only non-city bus that should be allowed to drive in that lane is Jerome Bettis. (HA!)


*Say this in a heavily underwhelmed tone.

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You went to DC last night? Did you get to enjoy the experience of Mellon Arena-South? All those buses were probably Puckin' Fittsburgh fans coming to fill the VC to capacity. I heard they had something like 15-25 buses full of fans head this way.

It Sucked, thats all I will say about that.

3/28/2007 06:18:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, and all those "hot" motorcycle cops look like that because they are *IN* uniform... the boots, the helments, the shiny black leather everywhere... I know a few motorcycle cops and you would not want to see them out of uniform, the engine vibrations going through their bodies alone would make must people wreck from being sick.....

3/28/2007 06:22:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

now put the two tragic systems together (sporatic motorcades and inconsistent bus operations) and you get an hour long wait during rush hour at a bus stop on K st while three different buses were stuck in a motorcade by the Verizon center. and not a goddamn bus could cut a block over and continue on its route. No wonder everyone in DC is so power hungry: only the important people get any place ontime.

3/29/2007 11:07:00 AM  
Blogger Buggie said...

Hee hee, Brian. Some of them boys were kind of hot... they could have at least winked at me. Or they should make sure they hire only hot guy to ride motorcyles and give them a uniform like the one guy on Reno 911

3/29/2007 11:13:00 AM  
Blogger Buggie said...

It takes me over an hour to get from Bethesda to DC. I say nononononono. It is less than 8 miles!

3/29/2007 11:14:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's pretty amazing to see the many different things that affect our traffic on a day-to-day basis. Motorcades, bad zoning of bus routes. Not fun at all.

3/31/2007 04:01:00 PM  

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