Ah Bugger

The vapid utterings of a neurotic mind.

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Location: DC, United States

I ain't too proud to bug.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Wine and Wii

(B) JT is here to wine and Wii with me. (J) I am going to kick Bug's ass in bowling (I almost wrote "blowing", which is a completely different game). Wii is on. (B)We are playing Rayman. JT Is gonna kick me arse. Again. (J) Multi-players = multi-pass? We cannot even figure out how to get two people to play the game. How can one possibly kick one's arse in this condition? Bex -- I just hope I get to the dance club portion.

(B) Kicked her patootie. (FINALLY!) That was fun. Esp. the stage part where we danced. We danced like there is no tomorrow. (J) She did! Kicked it and kicked it hard. Of course, let's not forget that I came from a company meeting where they served wine. Not that I'm saying that influened the game. Not at all. (B) OHMYGOD! She thinks she is soooo much better than me at Wii But only Bowling. Just bowling. (Of course it is all we play, soo...) (J) So, let's bowl, baby! No! No bowling! Psyched me out! Ruse! Instead, Playground dodgeball. Perhaps not surprisingly, Wii dodgeball is just like my real life grade school dodgeball experience, where I am the last person to understand the rules and the last person picked. But, all is redeemed when we play tetherball and the lonely, fat kid with the cheap gym shorts wins the respect of her peers by whipping the virtual tether ball around Bug's tiny butt.

(B)OKay, I can't write fiction, so lemme tell it how it really is. My butt is not teeny. I need to attempt to beat her ass at Tetherball. I did, but then she kicked mine in wall ball. Then she tripped over the rug, in a fit of joy, to pour me more wine out of the ginormous bottle that just happened to be open. (J) Just happened to be, my wall ball bruised butt . That was grand fun. Why do I feel too old for Wii? Why do I feel as if I played against a 17 year-old I would be woefully out of touch with the lingo? Like when I asked Dave's and (by default) my nieces' whether or not they like (phoentic pronounciation) AH-vril Lahveen? And they said, "um, it's Avril." And I felt super uncool. (B) Surprisingly, for such a cool chick, JT has a repetoire of such stories. But I prefer a more slapstick approach, hence the luge down my front steps. (J) Which resulted in some serious pay the piper (and the piper is the chiropractor). (B) but that got me out of work an hour early today, so... is it ALL bad? (J) GAH! How sad that an hour free from work could translate to literally back-breaking tasks. (B) For real. What will I do next? Fall from a tree? Fall off a ladder? Anything to get out of an hour of work? I did work 8 hours today, you know. Just had to be said...(J) Seriously...run in front of a bus? Do a show with Siegfried and Roy? The possibilities are endless. (B) Well, I will start contemplating them as the one thing that keeps me generally occupied is coming to screeching halt in less than two months!

(J) You better be going to Georgetown or I will kick your skinny ass! (B) Again, we have gone over this.. Ass not skinny. Maybe after our bike ride this weekend? Thank goodness for my padded seat (and not just the one on my bike). I have yet to hear back from Georgetown. What if they are just waiting to taunt me a second time? And then I will have to ... (J) Like I just taunted you whilst writing this last leg? Phew. How did G-town taunt you a first time? Did they say: "oh, you non-hoya loving devil?" Why do I hear crazy paw steps up above? (B) Cause you crazy! Or it is my upstairs neighbor's cats and dog. Her dog luuvvvs ME!. It makes me so happy. And she is sooo soft. What were we talking about?

(J) The animals are soft or the neighbor? (B) You know I have never petted my neighbor. Any of them. I dunno if she is soft. I could ask her next time I see her. I can't imagine her thinking that it's weird. (J) Or inappropriate in any way. (B) Have to interject. That comment made me choke on my wine. (J) Like that's unusual. (B) Point well taken JT. Point well taken. (Did I mention she tripped over the rug?) (J) I love the double saying, like in "Babe:" "That'll do, Pig. That'll do."

(B) My sister said that to a friend once who did not take too kindly to it. (J) Your sister called a friend a pig? (B) She told a friend "That'll do, Pig. That'll do." Yes. I guess she did. But I would not argue with my sister. She is freakishly strong. For reals. (J) I've wrestled Kirsten. It's true. She pinned me in a double nelson and I screamed Uncle for days. (B) You have an Uncle named For Days? I thought I had relatives with weird names. I had a friend named Dawn Nelson. I know she was not a twin. But she was pretty. She should have a twin and then they could pin people. (J) Do you think the band Nelson would approve? I can't live without your love, Bug. (B) I know JT. I know.


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