Baby Spice is all growed up!

And what has she done? She turned Petula Clark into Petula Tart! The song my brother sang so preciously non-stop at age three has now become an anthem for what kids don't think is real sex these days. (Yeah, I am hedging my words a bit because well, hey! I think if you can't figure out what I am talking about, then you really don't need to know.)
In the video for her version of "Downtown", Emma Bunton gives plenty of direction to her many suitors. (Well, in the beginning of the video which is all I watched until someone told me it was not completely offensive. The rest is all random hotel shenanigans. Still.)

These innocent lyrics have a whole new meaning, and it's all Baby Spice's fault.

"...And you may find somebody kind to help and understand you. Someone who is just like you and needs a gentle hand to guide them along".

PSA: Stop the madness that was the Spice Girls. If Posh Spice's nostrils get any bigger, she will suck Beckham's 9 year old boy chest in and choke. Seriously, how does he not have any pectoral muscles? He is an athlete!?! Though the rest is nice if you can get past that... But, it freaks me out.