L. Ron Hubbard strikes from the grave

I cannot believe that Tom Cruise Mapother IV managed to impregnate Katie Holmes. The German tabloids have labeled him non-heterosexual for years. He even sued them for it. But yet, I question...
You see Mr. Mapother has been married before. Two times.

1. Mimi Rogers. They were married for close to three years, yet never had any children. She, however, remarried and began having children at the ripe age of 45. She has two kids.
2. Nicole Kidman. They were married for close to ten years. They adopted two. I am going to guess here, but I'll bet Nicole wanted children and because she was his beard, she had to get them elsewhere.

And that is not all. He was a Franciscan seminary student at the ripe age of fourteen. Which kid, with hormones a-flailing, wants to become a priest or a monk?

So now he is with the young Katie Holmes. There is something suspicious about the way he moves through his relationships. Mimi Rogers was at the beginning of his career, you know when he needed an older lady to bring his boyishness to some sort of level... Nicole was strung along, perhaps to make her career better? I dunno. But Katie? The rumor is that he "auditioned" a bunch of girls to be his next amour. She won (or lost, in my opinion).

But let us get back to her whole pregnancy. That was done quickly, no? I mean, she auditions, they date, engagement, BAM! Pregnant. I think that Tom was looking for a ripe specimen in which to insert the long forgotten seed of the dead leader of the Scientology clan, L. Ron Hubbard. Mr. Hubbard was a crazy man. I could totally see him storing his sperm so that he may populate the Earth, long after he is gone. BUT the caveat is that it has to be in the right woman. (An easily manipulated woman.) I think that Tom Cruise and the Scientologists, who think that they come from another planet and that someday the big spaceship will return to come and take them home, have decided it is time for a new leader. Maybe Tom Cruise was jumping up and down on Oprah's couch because he knew that soon he'd have a leader again.

Does this mean that the spaceship is coming for them in the next 30 years or so?