Ah Bugger

The vapid utterings of a neurotic mind.

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I ain't too proud to bug.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

On a related note (see below)

I like wine. But I don't like to imbibe so much anymore.
I like to feel things entirely. I think it is the scariest feeling in the world. But I need to experience the emotions completely. Maybe it comes with my character of wearing my emotions on my sleeve. So when I am sad, I like to be completely sad. Watch a sad film, listen to desperate music, close my eyes and be completely sad. Tonight, red wine fits the mood. It is so smooth and velvety, yet heavy and (I dunno, for lack of better words) it tastes sad.
I don't know if letting myself get enveloped by a feeling is helpful, but it does seem to allow me to shake it off fairly quickly.
But I wonder if I allow myself to delve into happiness and anger as much as I do with sadness. But isn't it so much easier to indulge in sadness, because it is so isolated. There are so many songs and films and such to further facilitate this feeling.
I dunno.

I like wine.

I am sad.

I will be fine tomorrow.

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

novels is very important to remember when writing anything these days.

10/20/2005 10:24:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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10/20/2005 10:25:00 PM  
Blogger Meg said...

Mebbe Buggie needs a vacation? To a happy land of adorable exchange student boys?

10/21/2005 05:51:00 AM  
Blogger MG said...

Every once in a while you have to come up for air and let your mind steer for a while rather than being directed by emotion.

I know you know this, but I figured I say it anyway.

10/21/2005 08:42:00 AM  
Blogger Busted Flip Flop said...

I am the same with with my emotions - which I guess is why I'm described as passionate.

For a long time it was easier for me to feel sadness than happieness, it took some time to learn to be open to all my feelings. I guess the trick is to never get lost in any emotion...

Hugs to the Bugs

10/21/2005 09:27:00 AM  
Blogger Claudette said...

I dive into my emotions head first and don't even look to see if it's safe before diving in... When I'm sad, I need to feel it completely, listen to sad songs, cry [read: howl and screech], throw something (well... sometimes) and feel it until I'm tired of feeling it. Then I have the emotional hangover the next day though. But, I seem to feel OK for a good while after that.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I think I know what you mean.

Maybe we can all cry on Sunday night to the movie and let everything else out yet still just blame it on the movie?

10/21/2005 11:45:00 AM  
Blogger Bekkah said...

Jeez, guess we're all feeling a little down this week, eh?

When I'm sad...I completely wallow in it. I absolutely get lost in it and I let it run it's course. And then I pick myself up and I move on. I know that I never give into happiness like I do with sadness. That doesn't mean that I don't have completely blissful moments (because I do!), but it means that I'm EXTREMELY cautious and I'm always checking to see what's lurking around my happy-little-corner. Life experiences...it’ll make us all have a different reaction.

As long as the last line that you typed is honest to your emotions...then I say have a glass for me ;)

10/21/2005 02:07:00 PM  
Blogger Marci (aka Baby Banana) said...

Girl, I love you so much---to the point there are tears welling in my eyeballs right now. Quick..change the subject...

[invoking old TV ad] Well, what can we say about Busted? She's paaaasionate.

...Ok. That's better. I think you've got a pretty healthy turn going on right now. It would be bad if you were denying those emotions. Oh how I would hate boxing class if you were doing that. In the meantime, drink wine. Sing songs. And study.

10/21/2005 07:05:00 PM  
Blogger MG said...

What? Movie? Sunday? Hunh?

/sniff

10/21/2005 09:03:00 PM  
Blogger Buggie said...

Aw, two random anons felt they had to make me feel better. Thanks, Anons.

Meg, Buggie will be in Germany in 4 weeks. And my mum and I are probably gonna stop through Prague (Or as the guy at the Norfolk Godiva store called it, Pragoo.) So, you are to have dinner with us, yes?

MG: I am working on that, but it is really hard. But I'm getting there.

Busted, Aren't we just cut from the same cloth? You know, when I fly, I can't hear for a good day or two and then my ears spend an inordinate amount of time going kappow!

Cluss: Yes, blame the movie. Though I saw that movie with the very same "him" of the previous post... So be prepared to look the other way. Naw, let's take out our aggressions using our fists! (That's sounds so wrong, but it is oh-so-right!)

Bekkah: I do feel fine today. Happy and ready to engage my writing skills to finish my damn paper. Having all your great words also makes me better. I think that is why I indulge so hard, cause then, when the song is done, the sadness is gone. Yay. Let's learn to indulge the happiness.

Marci: Aw, you make me gooey. Love you so much. And, I could not hit you as hard as I do were it not for my mental instabilities, right?

Example of our boxing class, landing right crosses:
"Come on, knock that bitch out."
"You smell like teen spirit!"

Aw, she's Paaassionate. I laughed out loud!!!

Loving you guys!

10/21/2005 09:38:00 PM  

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