Marie Claire interviews Bug. (Sort of)

Whenever I see a short interview in a magazine, I wonder what kinds of questions people would ask me, you know, should they decide that there are questions that only I have the most sage and witty answers to.
So I decided to usurp an interview from Marie Claire magazine, March 2013. I'm just going to delete Emma Watson's words and replace them with mine. Yay.

WHAT'S ON YOUR...

Liquor shelf or bar: First off, isn't Emma Watson 12? Shouldn't she not have things on her liquor shelf? Wait, should she even HAVE a liquor shelf? And only a shelf? Rookies. Oh, my answer is dark beers and red wine. 

Perennial to do list: Clean the litterbox. Seriously. Every to do list has this on it. 

Last Credit Card Bill:  Um, late fees and finance charges. Weeeeeeee!

Netflix Queue: Every single movie that anyone may have even just vaguely referenced in film school. Though I admit that the last thing I watched on Netflix that was not research or for school was an Australian teen show about ballet dancers called Dance Academy.

Ideal Dinner Party Guest List: Martha Stewart (someone has to set the table), Julia Child (someone has to cook), Tom Ford (someone needs to dress me), Coco Chanel (someone needs to make me pretty), Idina Menzel (someone needs to sing), Ryan Gosling (duh), and that guy who lifted my skirt and looked at my underpants in the 2nd grade (someone needs to clean the litterbox). 

Feet: I have a dwindling but still delightful collection of whimsical socks. My favorites include ones with Boston Terriers on them (Go BU!), a recent acquisition that look like sock monkey socks, and my holey (holy) Hannukah socks. 

Sh*t List: For shame, Marie Claire. Um, I hate people who are snotty without a reason, especially when I am feeling a little shy and so I try to grin and make at least a vague connection. Yucky.

iPhone App List: I'm gonna copy Emma here and go with the Aroundme app. Use it every day. I also like Accuweather because I like to see how much they can lie to me about snow in one winter. 

Coffee Table: My coffee table is a leather ottoman and it usually is covered by laptop and cat.

Playlist: Oh goodness, I hate to admit this but I love that new Taylor Swift song 'Trouble'. I also love Paramore, and that song by Sia and David Guetta 'Titanium'. I also like Bruno Mars 'It Will Rain' and 'Cough Syrup' by Young the Giant.

Charity List: I've donated to Kiva for years. I used to deliver for Meals on Wheels. I'd like to get involved with Rhino preservation. 

Bucket List: Totally just wrote bucket lust, but I don't think I have that. I'd like to get to every continent. I want to see one of my screenplays/teleplays get made into a real studio production. 

Pinterest Board: Okay, I am woefully under-invested in pinterest. So I just pin things that I want that I can't afford. Maybe someone will see it and buy it for me? I also used pinterest once to pin a ton of bangs that I liked and also bangs that I didn't like so I could be very clear for my hair stylist when he was cutting the bangs that I ended up loving before they grew a little too long and I was too lazy to get them trimmed and now they linger at a weird place around my nose and poke my eyeballs all of the time. 

Workout Plan: I have one. I am sure of it. I just have to clean the litterbox first.

All Time Favorite Books List: 'The Last Days of Summer' by Steven Kluger. This is such a charming book. I laughed out loud. I cried. I spoke to the author on Facebook once and he told me he had written it for his dad. That made me love it even more.

Screen Saver: On my phone it is a picture of me and my mom.

The Walls of Your Favorite Room in Your House: I love this picture my friend gave to me of all the places we've been on my birthday over the years. It's such a wonderful reminder of some really fun trips and how long we've been friends.

Vanity Cabinet Shelves: I don't have these. I assume they're asking what's my favorite beauty product. I love the Moroccan Hair Oil and Burt's Bees Lip Balm. I'd like a magical mascara that makes my short, straight lashes long, lush and curly. 

Car stereo: I listen to my iPod, the one I didn't lose. I also listen to a WAMU and WTOP which is a sign that I am getting old. When I was a kid and my mom would be driving me somewhere, her need to listen to talk radio seemed ridiculous. The car is a perfect concert venue! Now I am my mother. 

Twitter Feed: I follow all TV writers because I plan to steal their ideas. 

Go-To Menu: I am sooo lazy that I try to eat foods that I can just jam into my mouth. However, if I am hosting a fancy meal, my go to is beef Wellington. But that has not happened in a while. 

Your Top 5 List: Top 5 of what? Things I can't live without? 1. My cat Bill Simon. 2. My family. 3. Reading material. 4. Fruit (especially pomegranates, grapefruit, berries). 5. Wheels. This girl needs to travel! I like driving around. Also, music. I know, I said I listen to talk radio, but you would not BELIEVE the concerts I have had in my car and house. 

Instagram: No. 

Nightstand: Sparkling water because I am fancy when I am late night thirsty. My iPad because reading is good. About a 100 books that I am either reading or waiting to read. Right now I am reading "A Visit From the Goon Squad" by Jennifer Egan. 

Future Itinerary: I want to get out to LA. I want to visit my newly reconnected cousins in Oregon. I want to go to some water place with my friends for my birthday. I want to go to Uganda because I have a student whose grandfather is high up there and I want to utilize that connection. This list could go on and on forever!

Fantasy Itinerary: See above.